(aspiring) Domestic Goddess Mommy
Follow the adventures of a writer, wife and mother of 3 who strives (sometimes) to be a Domestic Goddess.
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The snow is piling up on bushes and buds pushing through this typically mild English winter. School was cancelled just as flakes began to fall, as head teachers noted the drive home would be too dangerous for teachers and students alike.
Happily, the children made snow angels, snow balls and tracks through a backyard blanketed in white. Though this would be nothing more than a mild inconvenience in Michigan, it puts an unequipped area into a virtual standstill.
When the coats and gloves and boots were too wet to remain on their small, chilled bodies, we turned to computer games, books, monster-making projects and plenty of hugs and cuddles.
The Boy did well in preschool this week, though I left him crying both Tuesday and Thursday. He came out the door at 3 o’clock happy, smiling and jumping! He loves the full set of Cars toys he gets to play with there, but his favorite thing? His teacher. He is so sweet.
I spent the quiet days catching up on household necessities and figuring out taxes and residence visas. So much paperwork it will make my eyes bleed when I fill it all out! More productively, in my opinion, were the minutes spent writing posts, paid articles and voraciously pouring over videos and interviews of transformational leaders, learning about EFT, The Work and of course, The Passion Test materials. I’ll tell you more about all of those in future posts and on the new website I’m working on: www.affirmativethought.com. Don’t bother visiting yet! It will be under construction for a few more months.
I’m now leaning toward switching from a March training in India to a May training in Tel Aviv. To do either, I need to get my peer-backing campaign posted! I’m half-way there. The goal is to go live by Thursday next week, so watch for it, share it, and hopefully, contribute toward it!
But now, it is time to put it all away for the weekend and enjoy precious family and leisure time. Little Rose has her first play-date tomorrow and I’m hoping to escape to see Les Miserables! Wish me luck; I’ll need it.
Have a beautiful weekend.
It felt strange to walk back to the car by myself. For the first time in 7 years there is no child in my care. Sure, I’ve had babysitters here and there, I worked at the wine store or ran a wine-tasting and left the kids in someone else’s care, but this feels very different.
All three of my children are in school.
I came home, cleaned the kitchen, made the pasta sauce for tonight’s dinner, did some laundry, read e-mails, wrote a blog post and read a few others all in a span of 3 hours. I still have another hour and half before heading back to school and I’ve already accomplished more than I usually do in 2 days.
You have a life before you become a mother. Then, once you have a baby, being a mother becomes your life.
I’ve gone through all of the early childhood phases now. I’ve had three pregnancies, three beautiful babies, three periods of newborn sleeplessness, three first foods, three first teeth, three first steps with the help of table edges or nice baby walkers turning them into little sprinters… I’ve breastfed, I’ve bottle-fed, I’ve been spit up on, peed on and changed many messy diapers.
I’ve taken care of sick babies, injured babies, sad toddlers and temper tantrums. I’ve read hundreds of books, sung hundreds of songs, and kissed those 3 pairs of cheeks thousands of times. I’ve been the blessed giver and receiver of hugs 24-hours a day, 7 days a week.
Now… 18 hours of my week will be spent child-free. 18 hours. 3 days from 9am to 3pm I am on my own. I am no longer solely responsible for the care and education of my son. It is the first day of the next phase of my life.
Some women wonder what to do at this point in their lives, but I know. I am stepping into being my whole self. Wife, Mother and Woman – a trinity of the feminine. For years the balance has tipped heavily on the first two, but now it is the woman’s turn to shine. Balance will be restored. “Mrs” and “Mommy” will make room again for “Tamara.” In a few month’s time I’ll be a certified Passion Test Facilitator. I’ll be coaching women like me to find and fulfill their greatest passions.
I love my roles as wife and mother. I love my family. But I am on fire to live a part of my life again just for me. The best part of it? The “just for me” bit is going to bring so much more to my family and to the world than if I continued to devote every waking moment to home, husband and children.
Watch me shine, people!
The weather has been very cold for the past few days. Freezing, even! The crisp chill in the air smells the same all over the world at 32˚F. If you’re from anywhere that gets cold enough to snow regularly, you recognize the teasing scent of flakes well before they fall.
We awoke to a winter wonderland this morning. The white, dusty coat of snow surprised and delighted us. Just yesterday we went tromping through muddy fields in our Wellies and today we would have been better off with snow boots!
The milder weather inspires us to get out much more often than we did during our Michigan winters. It rains more than snows here and the temperature for the past month has typically hovered around 40˚F.
With an expansive forest just down the road from us, we’ve taken several Sundays to walk. The kids complain, whine and moan. They would rather stay home and play, but a reminder of the fun we had the last time gets them motivated. Me too. I have to admit that I’d rather stay warm and cozy cuddled up with a good book and a hot cup of coffee, but then I remember how our moods are boosted every time by an hour out in the fresh air and the stunning countryside.
So we go, mud and all. Last week Nature Girl lost her balance and fell right into it. It was thick and squishy and I had lots of laundry to do that afternoon (see The Boy’s left leg in the picture?). And very dirty shoes as I only got my own pair of Wellingtons yesterday.
But I don’t mind, because each time we go, amid the whining, there is joy. There is laughter and the wonder of spending time in nature. We are building memories of a wonderful childhood that will bond the three of them together forever.
I hear the whispers of their grown selves saying, “Remember how Mom and Papa would drag us out no matter how cold it was? Remember that time we had a picnic and it was so cold we had to eat with our gloves on? Remember when you fell in the mud?!”
Happy moments create happy memories and together they make happy children. As parents, we make so many mistakes, but hopefully most of them will be forgotten, nudged out of the shadows of our children’s minds by all the moments we get just right. All the love, laughter and joy that we share will take the biggest space in their hearts.
Go make memories – play in the snow, or the mud, or the rain with your children (or Grandchildren!). Just play. And love.
Well, it’s Wednesday and that means it’s time to link up withMama Kat’s Vlogging Workshop! This week I chose to talk about my worst babysitting job. I certainly hope you wouldn’t do this to your babysitter… or your baby!
Remember to leave me a comment and tell me about yours!
It’s those little details that make you feel “at home.” Like your favorite shops (look at my vocab converting from American English to UK English! “stores” in US, “Shops” in UK), foods and even laundry detergent. When I lived in Singapore, I had my mom send me boxes of Downy dryer sheets!
I’ve discovered I can get many of my favorites from Amazon grocery, but there’s nothing quite like walking in to a familiar store, seeing familiar choices and discovering they taste the same as “at home.” This weekend we discovered Costco is a mere 15-minute drive from our house!
We loaded up the 3 kids in our little Ford Fiesta and had an all-American afternoon! Pizza Hut for lunch (I could feel the grease at work within minutes!) and shopping at Costco!
We almost didn’t get to join. The rules for membership are different here; you have to work for one of a short list of company types, like airlines, legal or education. Office furniture doesn’t cut it, but fortunately my husband still had his US Costco card in his wallet and that got us our in! Hooray!
The man and I will probably never get to go together again; taking the kids is sheer torture for all of us. I probably won’t be brave enough to drive there myself for a while because there are too many massive roundabouts and Reading (yes, like the Monopoly game!), where our closest Costco is located, is big-city compared to where I usually drive.
Nevertheless, finding Costco is like finding a little piece of “home” and the children, especially Nature Girl, enjoyed their ice cream like they haven’t since our big move overseas! Thanks, Costco!
*** Though it might read like one, this is not a sponsored post by any means! I’m just sharing one of the little things that makes daily life better!
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